Fractured Logic
by Laiqalasse
Summary: here's another Legolas/Aragorn friendship story


Disclaimer: They're not mine.  
  
Summary: See author's notes  
  
Warning: THE F-WORD APPEARS TWICE IN THIS FIC. BE AWARE OF THAT *NOW.*  
  
Author's Notes: I have always found Aragorn and Legolas' relationship intriguing. They seem to be closer than friends normally are, and for a long time I was into A/L slash, but that doesn't really seem to be right, either. This is my attempt to explain their relationship. So you Aragorn/Legolas friendship lovers, this is for you. It's safe from slash yet it's more than a simple case of casual friendship. Also, just be aware that though this isn't exactly book-verse, I did use the timeline of the book as inspiration, mainly in that they spent nearly a month at Imladris before they set out. This little vignette takes place sometime during that month.  
  
Also, I realize they probably didn't use the word "fuck" back then, but I couldn't think of anything comparable. Just read it and you'll know what I mean.  
  
  
  
Dedication: This is for SALYSHA who pointed out that the good Arrers/Leggy friendship stories are hard to find. Hope this one meets with your approval! :-)  
  
****Fractured Logic****  
  
I am lying on my back in the soft, tall grass, my head pillowed on Estel's lap. His long fingers comb gently through my golden hair as he unravels the tiny braids that run behind my ears. Though I am aware of his actions, my attention is focused on the stars twinkling above me.  
  
My home of Greenwood, or Mirkwood as it is now known, is a dense forest, and a glimpse of the stars is a rare sight for us. This trip to Imladris has been a rare treat, for it is said that the stars shine brighter here than they do any other place on this earth, except for above the ocean. I have been unwilling to spend a single night inside so long as the sky has remained free of clouds. Most nights I have company, either from Elladan, Elrohir, Estel or some combination of the three.  
  
I have been lying in this spot since sundown. The air is warm, considering how late in the year it is, and the breeze is refreshing. A falling star streaks across the sky and a silly grin crosses my lips. I would trade anything I own to stay like this forever. I am in utter bliss at this moment.  
  
The fall of heavy footsteps reaches my ears and I immediately turn my attention toward the sound, though I do not tear my eyes from the sky above me. The footsteps grow closer and finally I force myself to turn my head in the direction of the distraction.  
  
A few moments later Boromir emerges into our clearing, looking surprised to see anyone here. His eyes narrow when he notices the position Estel and I are in and Estel tenses, though his fingers never cease to slide through my hair. The Gondorian opens his mouth and I expect harsh words. Instead I only hear a slightly disgusted sigh before he spins on his heel and vanishes back into the woods. I raise my eyes to meet Estel's. "He doesn't understand." And to be honest, neither do I. I don't understand why Men are so afraid of touch and emotion.  
  
Estel sighs. "No, he doesn't, Wethrin. He could never understand. Few Men could, though there are some." His grey eyes are filled with sadness.  
  
"You do." Two words. So simple on the surface, yet a depth of meaning and questions beneath. How can Estel understand when Boromir doesn't? Why doesn't Boromir understand when Estel does? Is it simply the way they are raised or does it have to do with their hearts? Why are Men repulsed by affection yet driven by lust when Elves are the opposite? I genuinely don't understand.  
  
Estel smiles patiently down at me. He heard the questions in my statement. "Yes, Legolas, I do. There are many factors. The blood of Numenor runs thicker in my blood than it does in most Men and that helps. Also, you know I was raised in the Valley, so much Elven influence has rubbed off on me. Boromir is the son of a ruler who has spent many years defending his land against the shadows of Mordor. That has hardened Boromir's heart. Also, he grew up in a city of cold stone, not in a forest of living trees." His voice is gentle but not condescending. Yet he still has not answered all my questions.  
  
"But why do Men shy away from genuine affection? They prefer lust to true feelings of love. Why?" Estel shrugs.  
  
"I don't know, Legolas. I don't believe anyone does. It is simply how Men are. Let *me* ask *you* a question. How do you think Boromir would have reacted if he had come into this clearing and found us fucking? Not making love; no actual affection between us, just simply fucking. Would he have been equally disgusted?"  
  
I'm confused. My first impulse was to answer "yes," yet something tells me this is a trick question. I cannot, however, figure out why he *wouldn't* be disgusted. I tell Estel as much.  
  
"You were right, in some ways it *was* a trick question. Boromir would not have been disgusted if he had walked in to see us behaving that way for you said yourself that Men understand lust. However, it is hard to understand something you have little experience with, and Boromir has been lacking love his whole life. Men are naturally afraid of what they do not know and then they get angry for being afraid. Does that make sense?"  
  
My brow wrinkles as I think this through. "Yes and no. I understand what you're saying, but the logic behind it makes no sense." I know I must sound like a child with this string of questions but I truly cannot make myself understand.  
  
Estel smiles gently down at me and brushes a few strands of hair from my face. "Now Legolas, you know Men are not a logical race. Don't worry yourself over it, Meldir."  
  
I smile back but I don't really feel it. Something still bothers me. Will the members of the Fellowship accept the nature of our relationship? We are not lovers, but we are closer than brothers. It is complicated. I was visiting Imladris when Estel was just a child and he became very attached to me. In my turn I grew to love him like a little brother. When he was scared or confused and didn't want to go to Elrond or the twins, he would seek me out and we would play and talk. I taught him archery and how to ride a horse.  
  
I returned to Mirkwood when he entered adolescence and did not see him until he entered my home as a Ranger. By then I was older as well and had more dealings with humans. They confused me greatly and I turned to him for answers as he had once turned to me for answers about Elves. In that way he became the more experienced teacher and I was the rank student. Then Estel left again and it was several more years before we reunited. By this time he had far more experience in dealing with different races than I and our roles were almost completely reversed. He seemed more like the elder brother and I was the naive child. It was with that return that I realized how fond I was of Elrond's fosterling.  
  
Though Elves don't usually engage in public displays of affection, we are very physical beings, delighting in touching. There is no mistaking an innocent touch of affection for a sexual advance in our society, as there are many other factors involved in a display of sexual attraction. There is no sexual tension between myself and Estel for his heart belongs solely to Arwen and I have my own lover. Neither Estel or I would ever *dream* of betraying our beloved in either thought or action.  
  
I take as many opportunities to touch Estel as I can since I know my time with him is limited. Unlike my Elven friends, he will not live forever so I have to use the time that is given to us and I believe he acts for the same reason. He knows he will not have eternity to demonstrate how much he cares for me. That is why we are often found like we are now, or one of us tucked in the other's arms.  
  
Estel yawns and I suddenly realize how late it is. "I'm sorry, mellon-nin. It is late, go to bed." I sit up so that he may stand and return to the House and his warm bed. Instead he stretches himself out on the grass perpendicular to me and pulls me back down so that my head is pillowed on his chest.  
  
"I think I'll stay out here with you tonight, Wethrin, as long as you don't mind." His left arm is lying across my chest and I take his hand in mine.  
  
"I don't mind at all, Estel." We fall silent for many minutes and Estel is almost asleep when I sense the approach of two other Elves. A smile appears on my lips when Elladan and Elrohir plunk themselves down next to me, one on each side.  
  
"We thought we'd have a family sleep-out like we used to." Elladan stretches out on the grass to my left, his head on my stomach, like mine is on Estel's.  
  
Estel answers in a mumble as he drifts off to sleep. "Make yourselves comfortable."  
  
Elrohir curls up against me on my right side, my shoulder his pillow. Warm breath hits my neck and I press a soft kiss to Elrohir's forehead. "Rest well, my friends and let us savor the time we have here together before the Company sets out for it may be all the time the Valar have given to us on this land." The twins quickly fall asleep and as I am surrounded by warm slumbering bodies I find it impossible to stay awake any longer. I wing a silent apology to the stars twinkling above me then allow myself to slip into dreams, happy and content.  
  
********  
  
Additional Author's Notes: Alright. Elves don't really sleep like we humans do, but I used the word sleep anyway. It's easier than saying "resting" because that don't really seem to fit, either. Please don't flame me saying "Elves don't sleep!" I know that.  
  
Now for the Elvish translations:  
  
Wethrin = 'shadow' (it is a nickname given to Legolas by Glorfindel in "Greenleaf")//Meldir = Friend//Mellon-nin = my friend 


End file.
